I run in circles making sense of us.
But I still don't get it, and it's only making me hate you.
It's not your fault that I still think about you every night,
or that the smell in the air makes me want to point out constellations
with you.
And spend all day in your bed watching bad tv.

But really, the rain is to blame.
Because every time it falls I think of the day you walked away and how,
I couldn't cry until it stopped.
Like I was waiting my turn.
And by the way, I actually quite liked seeing you in my dreams.
At least then I was seeing you.

And honestly, I'm really sorry
that when you believed in me the most,
I just didn't know what to say.
So I lied until we stopped talking,
Like a get out of jail free card, except now,
You probably hate me.

While I'm here confessing, you should know,
You never meant a **** thing.
Not even a little.
And you never will.
I-was-using-you and you-were-a-mistake.

I heard somewhere "the truth will set you free,"
At least, that's what you taught me.
But I never believed in you because,
You always hated me.
And I hate the way you talk about me when you think I'm not around.
Yea, you're not fooling anyone.

Still, I love the way you say you love me,
Like I'm the best thing since getting high.
Because I could float around on your words all day.
But sometimes I think, we're getting closer to a problem,
Than we are to the solution.
And that chills me all the way into my marrow.

Also, baby, you should know, I love your arms around me and,
the way you make me feel like I'm the sun.
But I hate the way you lie,
and need, and sometimes disappear.
And I could never ever love you quite enough.
So please don't try and make me.

By the way, I think you're wonderful.
But sometimes I get scared that you don't love me anymore.
Because you're tired and I've been hanging on for far too long,
You can't drown with me anymore.
I guess, it's time to swim.
Or at the very least, tred water.

Have I mentioned yet that you're my hero?
I really wish I could be more like you.
But the thing is, I always thought I was.
And hearing what you really thought about me
broke my heart.
Maybe someday, I'll learn how to try harder.
Or care.

Before I go I need to clarify, I hate you just as much as
I love you.
But the love is the only part that will go on forever.
And I know,
The feeling is mutual.