Sorry I'm a **** up...

I just can't help it.
I just can't stop it.

I tried...

I tell my self,
"Why do you mess everything up?"
"Why do you ruin the only good in your life?"
And "Why can't you do it?"

I have the blade,
I have the note.
But what I don't have are the guts.
I don't want to hurt anyone;

But I ask myself,
"Who's there to hurt?"
No one,
Is the answer.

This is all it took.
I jumped off,
And felt alive.
"I'm free."

Then I was gone.

But i am free to roam the world,
Free to see how little I mattered,
Free to not care anymore.
Free to just be me.

So yeah,
I'm a **** up.
But **** it!