i always end up in a different place
that's what happens when you use no maps, you see:
you stumble from point A to point E
but what happened inbetween?

or maybe you took a shortcut to the desperation,
skipped all the cutting, cut all the skipping
maintained a perfect profile of a perfect you because you went from
0 to 60 in half as many seconds
and no one could even tell that while you were discussing derivatives
you were suggesting solutions
that had nothing to do with calculus.

or maybe you intentionally got everyone lost,
headed straight for the marshes, marched straight for the heading
reading: YOU ARE HERE
and here was somewhere where, yes, they could see basic outlines
but no one could even tell that while you showed them an outline
you were writing a novel
that had nothing to do with words

or maybe you intentionally made words a mystery,
described things in a language that only you could read,
wrapped them in metaphors until they made no sense to
anyone else.
and no one could even tell that while you made your words flowery,
you were writing a poem
that had nothing to do with living,
and something to do with dying,
and everything to do with killing
until you were finally forced to tell everyone (and really, weren't you
avoiding telling yourself?)
until you were finally forced to write the words
directly, as they really were, the
bare
blunt
naked
truth:

You want to die