when i look at you i think of all the times you've given me.
you used to be my idol, and not only that
but my best friend
and my twin.
we shared everything from music to pain
and sharing that pain made everything okay.
but then you found another crowd
and suddenly i fell from the highest cloud
to hit the ground.
bitter and hard and cold
and you off with others that were cooler than me.
and with the cool came a chill that froze me.
where were you then?
why did you turn your back?
what made you leave?
there were no more secrets or midnight snacks or sharing pain together (forever, as forever was implied)
i was left to bear it alone.
call me an idiot for picking you up again when the new friends decided they were done with you
but maybe i felt sorry
because, well- now you know what i felt.
and as much as i hate myself for loving you, no one should feel what you made me feel.
not even your worst enemy.
not even your best friend.