thoughts
fears
aspirations
goals
hopes
dreams

reflections
interactions
misinterpretations
observations

i read this list
the list you started
so many years before
back in the beginning

i sit in your shadow
and read it
with swollen eyelids
and a heavy heart
but not nearly as heavy
as the silence
that now fills the room
your room

the space
you can no longer fill
and will never
be able to fill again

i trace your letters
with my finger
and hear your voice
dictating the scribble
on the page
as I try to follow along
through thick tears

i don't know
which is worse
being forced to
let you go
or being haunted
by the memories
taking your place