Sep 2014
are you listening to the way the cars outside are speeding down the highway?
can you hear the rushed conversation of the young couple outside of your window?
darling, i'm sure you can hear the panic of the man next door, slamming on his alarm clock as he sleepily cursed his way out the door.
they say if you stand at the corner of yonge and bloor at 12:25pm,
you should take note of how quickly strangers will bustle right past
you without realizing that they were ever a thought in your mind,
observe how they rush, remember their thinking faces, see how
focused they are on what's next.
i hate the familiar awareness of the leaves changing for autumn,
and how people get so utterly sick when the weather decides to flip.
i can't stand how okay i am with cutting people out, although
the world tells me it's fine, that's good, you need to move on eventually,
anyways.
it feels like i leave parts of myself with people and i forget where
these pieces have gone -
it feels like i should be okay with losing parts and creating new ones,
but it feels, god, it feels
it feels
so
sickening.
i dont know why it is all i am aware of;
the way we tell stories in one, single breath,
the way we ask, "what's next?" in a moment of heat,
and the way i feel so miserable about your heart changing tomorrow,
i like the feeling of resting on your chest
and being allowed to rest my entirety on your body -
i like the slow movement of your chest rising and falling -
and the way your breathing refuses to rush.
i can't pull myself away from the sound of your heart pumping in your chest.
did you ever think that by the time your heart has pumped its 896,738,112th pump, i was already waiting millions of pumps ago
for you to make it this far?
i wish you were here
to hear these things i can't ignore.
the screeching of tires and the messy, rushed mutters of a young girl behind.
i hope you don't hear them as that, just as
the way a car is ready to adventure
and the way a girl is so eager to live.
it's just that i get so lost in the chaos and i wish
you were here
to hear these things
i can't ignore.
can you hear the rushed conversation of the young couple outside of your window?
darling, i'm sure you can hear the panic of the man next door, slamming on his alarm clock as he sleepily cursed his way out the door.
they say if you stand at the corner of yonge and bloor at 12:25pm,
you should take note of how quickly strangers will bustle right past
you without realizing that they were ever a thought in your mind,
observe how they rush, remember their thinking faces, see how
focused they are on what's next.
i hate the familiar awareness of the leaves changing for autumn,
and how people get so utterly sick when the weather decides to flip.
i can't stand how okay i am with cutting people out, although
the world tells me it's fine, that's good, you need to move on eventually,
anyways.
it feels like i leave parts of myself with people and i forget where
these pieces have gone -
it feels like i should be okay with losing parts and creating new ones,
but it feels, god, it feels
it feels
so
sickening.
i dont know why it is all i am aware of;
the way we tell stories in one, single breath,
the way we ask, "what's next?" in a moment of heat,
and the way i feel so miserable about your heart changing tomorrow,
i like the feeling of resting on your chest
and being allowed to rest my entirety on your body -
i like the slow movement of your chest rising and falling -
and the way your breathing refuses to rush.
i can't pull myself away from the sound of your heart pumping in your chest.
did you ever think that by the time your heart has pumped its 896,738,112th pump, i was already waiting millions of pumps ago
for you to make it this far?
i wish you were here
to hear these things i can't ignore.
the screeching of tires and the messy, rushed mutters of a young girl behind.
i hope you don't hear them as that, just as
the way a car is ready to adventure
and the way a girl is so eager to live.
it's just that i get so lost in the chaos and i wish
you were here
to hear these things
i can't ignore.
