I speak normally when in the company of normal people who enjoy normal things.
I speak inappropriately with my friends.
I think incoherently in my head and when I begin to drink too much cheap whiskey I talk to myself in bathrooms.

When I write I attempt to speak eloquently but I can't do that when I speak in bathrooms
or in my head
or with my friends
or when in the company of normal people who enjoy normal things

                                         so I usually just go to sleep.

In my dreams I speak to children
and monsters
and ex-girlfriends.

I don't know why I speak so many different ways to so many different people.

I want to speak with my hands but they refuse to speak with me. My hands only speak to the women who I hint at love with. I don't know what my hands say but it must not be very nice because the women eventually stop hinting back.

I want to teach my hands to speak kindly and warmly, but not sweatily, and to only occasionally speak the way I do with my friends.