I want to go to sleep
I don't want to feel you right now
Not by will, not awake
Your asbsence is too real this time

I know you're not coming back
But I don't want to know
I don't want to know anything

I don't want to know
What this life is like
Without you

It should be raining
It should be midnight
It should be Winter

My skin feels too warm
The clouds look too soft
There's too much sound
There's too much movement

Cars keep passing, people keep pacing,
Specks of light stream incessantly

Everything is as it's meant to be
Nothing is as it should be

Your eyes should be open
Reflecting like shadows into mine
Your hands should be gesturing figures
As your lips bring words to life

You should be awake right now
This sentence should not be here

I should not feel such demanding heaviness when
The tsunami of your blood
That once streamed through my veins
Has left me desperate, hollow, and empty

You will never feel as I feel in this moment
I think that's for the best

Yet I pray if love is as they say it is
Wherever you may find yourself
You can still feel my heart

The way it beats for you
The way it longs for you
The way it swells up at the mention of
Your name

I want to be asleep
I need to feel you now more than ever

I will survive this oppresive melancholy
If only through temporary intervals
Only if in dreams