when Helen tried to commit suicide I didn't know until she told me at the Oklahoma! premier when I said I hadn't seen her in so long and she casually stuffed her hands in her pockets and said Well, yeah, I tried to **** myself and was in a place so I took her face between my palms and kissed her forehead which was out of character for me, back then, but I wanted to pull the black out of her brain with my lips.