your breath tasted like the cigarettes
that your mom used to smoke in her mercedes
i could've sworn you quit trying to **** yourself
three years ago
but it turns out you just got better at hiding it.

remember that time i took you to church
and as we walked out you started crying
because you didn't think that the god
everyone was worshipping
would love you more than you hated yourself?

i tried to take you out
i tried to fix you
but it tore me up inside
because broken things sometimes can't be mended
and you were shattered glass that made my hands bleed too.

*(a.m.c.)