I am not so sure quite
What frightens me most;
The knowledge that my
Hands could break
You in half, metaphorically,
Or the inability
To judge the way
You could break me, literally.

I find myself lying next to bodies
To feel their heart,
As if their breathing
Could somehow remind me
That I am still here, that
I still breathe among them.

We can destroy the
Homes we made in people,
With the same shaky hands
We used to build them.
We can rip apart the same flesh
We tenderly kissed just hours before.
We are monsters;
I cannot breathe among them.

I've been finding myself
Alone in dark rooms,
Often with the ghost of
Your past and God,
Do we miss you.

I can no longer trust
My judgement on others;
I will lower them to my standard,
I will rip them apart
In my mind until they
Are no longer human,
But rather pawns.
I cannot love you like pawns.

I don't think I can love you at all.