picture it.
a unstable pairing of a god
and you
a ugly little girl.
feel the gnawing of
knowing whats happening behind
all those closed doors
that you are too afraid to open.
hear yourself begging the god
to come clean,
to just be honest.
taste the venom in his voice
as the god screams that it's all your fault
listen as the god goes on to explain,
how mean you are
and how if
you just wore a little more make-up
or styled your hair every now and again
maybe
he wouldn't have to run into another woman's arms.
feel the tears roll
as he explains how a girl
like you
was lucky he even looked twice.

picture the stupid
ugly little girl you are
believing god
and begging him to stay.
picture it,
really close your eyes and see
this little tragedy play out.

now hold onto for years
and imagine wondering
every now
and again if
maybe
god was right?
and no matter what anyone says
no matter what you have trained yourself
to believe
imagine gods words
haunting you
for years
and years.