I get so lonely and sometimes I can push it away and drink coffee or read poetry or listen to music. But the thing is that often my paid slams against the cage of my heart and escapes through my eyes, making tracks down my face. I have this thing called depression. Called ifeelwaytoofuckingdeep. Called sometimesijustwanttolayinbedcryingandlisteningtomusic. I want to stop crying multiple times a day and I want to stop feeling like my world is constantly on the edge of collapsing but I dont know if that will happen. I'm scared that nobody would really be able to want me if they find out how ******* up I really am but my friends call me blunt for a reason. I'm not really any good at stuffing my feelings. But I would like somebody to pull them out of my tummy and help me speak them. I would like somebody to give me a hug and wipe my tears. Better yet I want somebody who will let me cry. Loneliness is a disease that tears you part daily, minutely, secondly. I have diagnosed depression but that is simply a side effect of the lonely.