I'm starting to realize that maybe I never did love him.
Maybe people are right, maybe I was simply in love with the idea of him.
Maybe all I wanted was for some to love me,
Someone to care,
Someone like him.
His smile, his sense of humor, his attention, his whit;
all were things I couldn't get enough of.
He was never my best friend,
or closest confidant.
Lately it seemed as if I knew nothing about him.
I've watched him grow-up and mature, but still I don't know him.
That's my fault really.
I can't blame him for just not sharing his live story with me;
Because, he probably doesn't know much about me either..
How can I be in love with someone I never really knew?
Yes, I knew he loved baseball,
Blondes and blue eyes,
Any and ALL food,
He wished he was black or Mexican,
And he likes to think because he was born in the South that he's Southern.
But I don't know anything about his life.
How he personally is doing.
Who am I trying to kid, saying I'm in love with him?
It's ridiculous.
I love him, yes.
I care about him, yes.
But, I'm not IN love with him...


At least I wish I wasn't..