If you have ever worried about my presence
fading from your life, don't do it again.
I am somewhere on this earth,
starting over the count of my blessings and
praying for more.

I am at war with my soul.
She gives every obstacle that crosses our path
a home. She tends to push away from what
could possibly be a new beginning because
we've been told that we "ask for too much"
more than once.

I spend too much time being ******* at
people and the negativity they cause, and
the wrong that's in the world and how much
better it would be if positivity was what it
yearned for. And during those times,
I've noticed that the burdens I already carry
aren't as heavy anymore.

It's not easy living in a world where being
mentally imprisoned is socially okay, and
restricting yourself from the universe is
emotionally okay. That's not how it's
supposed to be.

It's not easy living in a world where love
struggles to find a home, and beings forget
that they are love. And showing
vulnerability is worse than not showing it
at all. That's not how it's supposed to be.

I've learned that the world can be a cold place,
and that it owes us nothing because it was
here first. So I have to keep on asking God for
the patience to get through these days, and to
gather the pieces to my puzzle at a steady pace.

I've learned that a big heart is a beautiful curse,
and that you are **** near lucky if you've been
blessed with one.  It can make it through the
darkest of nights and the brightest of days,
so many challenges and so much pain,
and remains in tact because of its strength.
The chances of giving are greater than receiving
because people have learned to be selfish and
stingy. I've asked God time and time again,
"Why did You give this to me?" And He
always replies and says that I need it for things
bigger than me. I need to show others that it is
okay to break down the concrete walls
surrounding their hearts and to let love in.

I've learned that you can't count on any and
every thing. For it all has their own seasons in
which they play a role in your life. But what
you gain from it is what will stay.
Have expectations but don't let them be too
high because others may walk away and
things may not be able to be what you want
anyway.

No matter how great the distance may be,
no matter how many minutes pass each day,
no matter how far you think I have strayed,
I will always be here. Trials and tribulations
may come, but I enter lives and stay.

So don't ever question the roles we have in
each other's lives. Don't distance yourself
because "I'm fine." Don't ever believe I
love you any less than before. Because I
am simply somewhere on this earth,
starting over the count of how many blessings
I have and praying for more.
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