it took everything

to not call you in Albuquerque, let
you know I'm here, just know I was
there just know I was driving the roads
breathing the same air, that this was the
closest we'd been since april of last year, that
you could see me, that you could see me but
I was too afraid of you not wanting to see me
too afraid of the commas you wouldn't use
the perpetual boredom sounding through
your replies, the I don't want anything to
do with you and I told brett that you
were probably one of those people
who never speaks to an ex once
you're done and I was both
surprised and hurt by my
lack of knowledge by the
sheer amount of things
that i didn't know
about you but
you never ask
these things
because they
never
matter



not until later.