Jolly old St. Nicholas, is knocking on my door.
He looks a little strange, like he's never looked before.
"I've had a few to many, and it's really hard to see.
So I ask you to forgive me, for not using your chimney."

I ask him to come in my house, and make himself at home.
He stumbles over my puppy dog, his mouth begins to foam.
"I hate to ask this question, I hate to bother you.
How many have you had, how many is a few?"

"I had an eggnog before I left, to celebrate it's true.
This is the time of year my friend, when nothing else will do.
I stopped at every store, on my merry way.
The reindeer would have went back home, if it wasn't for the day."

He reaches in his bright red sack, to give a gift to me.
And then he pat's his leg, and wants me on his knee.
I tell him I'm too old for that, then I tell him no.
I sit in a chair across from him, and ask him not to go.

He rises up from where he is, and says he cannot wait.
"Time is running out on me, and it's getting rather late.
Christmas comes but once a year, so let us have some fun.
Santa Claus is coming home, my work this year is done."

Before he left he promised me, safety on the way.
He'll call me in the morning, or maybe in a day.
Eggnog got him going, an addiction can't you see.
Santa Claus is getting drunk, more then he should be.