I hope that you believe me, for I wouldn’t tell a lie. I cannot turn my science homework in and this is why: I messed up the assignment that you gave us yesterday. It burbled from its test tube and went slithering away. It wriggled off the table, and it landed with a splat, convulsed across my bedroom floor and terrorized the cat. It shambled down the staircase with a horrid glorping noise. It wobbled to the family room and gobbled all my toys. It tumbled to the kitchen and digested every plate. That slimy blob enlarged with every item that it ate. It writhed around the living room digesting lamps and chairs, then snuck up on our napping dog and caught him unawares. I came to school upset today. My head’s in such a fog. But this is my excuse: You see, my homework ate my dog.