My first promise to you is this
I promise I never cared
The reason I stayed was to cure my own
Sadness, that's why I stared
Not out of love or longing
But momentary relief from this suffocating loneliness
My second promise to you,
You were a good placeholder
Someone to bear through my pale conversations
Someone who offered me their body
Which I gladly accepted
The way you taste was a wonderful distraction
From all the things I experience in my head
My third promise, then
I promise you are replaceable
Your contribution to me, was all I needed
And you are nothing more than
A temporary,
that I valued as I value thing day to day items
Good while I need them
Useless when I don't
My fourth promise
You could have been anyone
I loved you, but anyone could have been you
People are like gas, and any gas would have filled
The void within me
You filled me up, took up all my space and time
But I only needed you for a little while
My fifth and final promise,
And I really mean this one
Everything I have just written is a lie
You are everything I have wanted
You are everything I will want
And I'm broken by my own inability to have kept you
So I tell myself I am numb to you
But the truth is
You make me melt
And I don't want to be frozen anymore**
**last two lines from Incubus song "Have You Ever" written by Brandon Boyd