Dear family and friends At last, my son is walking the long gangplank to a happy married life. God bless his final journey to sanity. I'm sure his beautiful bride has learned how to cart a whole box of beer bottles out to the kerb very tuesday **** socks, ignore those **** posters on his walls, collect all his Penthouse Libraries and tie ties. It will be a happy life together. I was lost for words the day he came over to Mom and me to inform of his final adrenalin rush into matrimony. ( or was it matrimoney?) I was happy for him to be happy and even offered to escort him to the gate! We looked at his budget for the big do and quietly froze our bank accounts, shut down the family jewels and booked a holiday to Paris a day after the wedding.Confronting the bills was a frightening prospect for his mother and me. I am sure, honourable guests, you will have enjoyed the invitations of recycled paper? He offered to return my tie and brocade shirt the day after. But he was a good guy after all. So much like his father chip of the old block. Like father, like son blah blah blah He has a lovely wife, and she is smiling too at the catch she made. God bless that girls cunning. As a parting gift,my son, I have left you a legacy of lust and happiness. A supply of ******, so that you too, my son could walk around with a stiff neck! God bless the happy married couple!