You don't know how many times I have wanted to hug you when I was scared.
You don't know how many times I have cried after talking to you.
You don't know how I feel every time you tell me I have to do something I don't want to do.
I remember when you used to tell me that I didn't have to anything that I didn't want to do.
Now I wonder what has happened to you.
I used to think you would protect me from monsters, but now you have turned into something that I need protection from.
Now I can protect myself.
Not only from you, but from my own monsters too.
I don't like when you sick people on me, to convince me you have changed.
We both know you haven't.
We both know you won't.
Yet I keep coming back, with unfulfilled hopes.
You say I hurt you, but I know you hurt me more.
You don't seem to care, but you expect it from me.
I don't understand why you think I'm so cruel, when all I try to do is apologize to you.
Time went by and I grew up distant form you.
I have finally learned.
And I have grown too.
I realize that you will never go back.
I promise, I won't try to attack.
But I do have my defenses high, and I won't go down without a fight.
I don't feel like I know you anymore,
And you won't stop until you feel like you have settled the score.
Some days I feel like dying.
Like I don't wanna be around anymore.
Then I remember that I am not here for you.
I'm here for her.
She is my light.
Although, I know she feels dark.
I want her to be happy and feel loved for all of her life.
She deserved better than you all along.
I don't feel like you love me anymore.
I feel like she loves me a bit less.
But I won't ever say anything,
Because I know that feels selfish,
And my feelings don't matter to anyone,
So I won't let them see what I think or feel,
Or what I fight in my own flesh.
You don't know what I go through.
You don't know what I have done.
You don't know how I feel.
And you never will.
Because I am here for her.
For her.
She saves me.
I bet you didn't know that or ever take a second to think about it.
You should thank her for me being here as long as I have been.
If you ever really cared...