It's been a while since you've written, and it's been 3 weeks since my blankets have stopped smelling like you. I couldn't help but notice the way my body drowns in these sheets because you were my life vest but you were not there when i jumped in. I looked back at the dock before my head went under and i saw you just sitting there, watching me struggle. I tore you apart in my head every single strand of thread and love was separated until every bit of silence that was woven in has been exposed. But these strands don't hold any value when you're drowning, what I have done is destroyed the only thing that could give me buoyancy. Now I am left with extra weight on these shackles i bear and water filling up my lungs like a measuring cup to a recipe from Hell's kitchen. In your last letter you asked "Are we okay?" but you don't just tell someone you love them then let them drown.