I was gone for a while.
I have a silly idea.
Wouldn't be funny if I was gone forever.
I ******* hate all of you.
**** every single one of you.
you're gonna wish you cared
I'm psychic like that.
Then again I wouldn't be surprised
if you just didn't notice either
that's more probable.

Don't give me that " I'm being selfish" *******
I'm just doing you a favor.

be ******* gracious
and say thank you
It's the least you could do

Probably the least you're capable of.