back in the days..... when i was youthful bright longing in my eyes.
when life was a desperate struggle based on a whim....
i found myself at a place edge of a valley start of a mountain holding back , whilst .... looking forward, balanced on the rim.... of a new horizons skin. what to do....... what....
dive back into the shadow climb up into the light.
walking... on a tightrope of fraying indecision circling... round and round.
years of making myself dizzy... with fury andΒ Β rebounded thought pinging,slinging, stinging doubt.... about which way back... forth... back (g)round....and (g)round wore myself a groove, with witless, wistful pacing.
a grave slowly shuffled out, deeper, darker... valley dark, mountain light, grey grave groove... on the cusp between.....
mental twilight........... had me enthralled, everday shufflin... till, when...then.. somehow... i... ceased ...... to be me, frightened to decide....
.........epiphany........
any whichway was better than this..... grinding, ground down groove worn grave.
small steps, giant leaps. i found grace was in believing..... found was in the looking, laughter in the smiling life was in the living. direction was merely mindful deception.... coralling random disposition.
for one up for another..... down
purpose is a delicate preponent, in decsion making choices attitude the fulcrum on which it all approximates.......
valley dark mountain light both wrong both right take ..... a step, a leap, a bound, a flight, of fortunate fancy.... ........or petulant plight.