where do i get off
everything is moving
and i can't seem to get my head on straight
the grey sky above me
melting into the glass buildings
steel spikes growing out of the bone-dry earth
in your world
it's whiteboards covered in scrawling green text
in your world
it's not what you'd thought
the air around you so tangible that it chokes you
closes your throat and eyes against the pain
in your world
you can see the people
like insects
crawling the streets from the view from your apartment window on the 80th floor
in your world
the glass doesn't warp against the night sky freckled with bright lights and falling bodies
in your world
it's not the nausea that tears against your consciousness
it's more the darkness
it's not the desperation
it's the calm
beating it's head against your bathroom wall and saying over and over
over and over
over and over

in your world
it's the cigarettes at three in the morning
and after that
at midnight

you stare at the clock for six hours straight
but the seconds don't stop

the microwave beeps all night long as you stare at the blank TV screen
but the seconds don't stop