I haven't written in a while
Because I've been kidding myself that I'm okay.
But the truth is
I only feel when I am about to decay.

I write becuse it makes sense
When my thoughts do not.
But when I cover it up
I do too well.
I actually believe it.
But then I'm worse when I break, because I actually believed I had fixed a part of myself.

My biggest problem though, is fixing a part of me with you. Because then I break so much more when something goes wrong.

And I break
Crumble
Shatter.

And it's worse because its not just You. It's Him. And Them.
And nothing is going right right now
So I write.
Because I can't cry.
Because I refuse to be that weak.
I refuse to be who I was. Yet I won't let her go.

But right now
I'm broken
And bruised
And scarred
In pieces
Alone.