I read through my poems and started crying and I am tired. I wanted to cry earlier when my youngest sister left but I couldn't. i don't want to be the strong one. I'm not the strong one. Why does life turn out so differently than we wanted? I'm supposed to be doing homework, but how the **** am I supposed to care about some **** heiroglyphic assignment when my world ******* falls apart every night? I've always been so open with my emotions and for the past 5 weeks and 2 days I've been hiding behind a facade. A smile and a joke and a laugh. Low cut shirts and hints to boys and talks about *** equality. And I just want somebody to grab me and say "cut the *******" and i just want somebody to pick me up at two in the morning because they know I'm awake. I just want somebody to care and somebody that I can laugh with but also cry with. I'm sitting here, crying alone and it's so **** lonely and I'd give anything to make it stop. Anything to make it stop. When is all of this gonna get better? I'm begging you to tell me. Please please tell me.