"Thanks a lot. I’ve been disadvantaged from the start. You constrict the veins heading straight to my head. Re-routed the blood to my heart instead. I am brain dead, thinking strictly in blues and reds. Oh, I’m in enough trouble, man. Oh man, I’m in trouble again."

Why did I let it happen?

This is what I was scared of.

Not the exact situation but the emotion

I never thought it would be like this..

I was expecting an internal affair far too strong to share myself for long

I was weak

I am weak

"I know you think you know, but these eyelids are windows that shut you out from all the things that I don’t want you to know. And I refuse to tell you one single secret I own, ‘cause you’ll find I’m petrified of your eyes."

Your eyes tell such truths. Truths I sometimes can’t handle.

I look at you and know I’m wrong, and know you feel like crying

And all I can say is

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry…I don’t know where to go from here.