in a lobby, i sit and i look out. take my glasses off, stare at the fuzzy reflections through the window glare. count the dead flies in tiled 4x4 ceiling lights. one more day, and i'll drive home. but these couch patterns catch my eyes and the shadows dazzle in the corner. i see nothing. i look around and it is finally still, but still, i see nothing. beat, broke, bones, body. be gone, be me, catch my breath. exit sign crooked, french door bent. tiles and tumors, i sink into the sofa. it's stress, it's the lack of sleep, it's all because i let myself go. winter's woe, dry hands, bloodied nose. strangers smile.