I was never the sports star, smartest kid in class or even the coolest. More like low self esteem dork girl who had more guy friends than girls never felt like I fit in but always never cared. I lied.... They bullied me verbally, I was no longer invisible I was the punch line to everybody's joke on bus 12 after a long day of school. I kept my head down because the **** hurts more than they could physically ever know. The walk home consisted of promising myself I wouldn't cry and debating on if I hated them or myself more. Dear arms I am sorry I've been taking all of my frustration out on you, it's just that since I'm not a size 6 everyone hates me so I have to hate you. How was school? Cool. Bad day? Bad life. Don't pretend like you care because I've spent too many nights alone in my room crying and screaming while my "mother" was in the next room. Dear heart I'm sorry I always let you down, I'm sorry I make you go through so much. I'm sorry you have to feel everything I feel. It's my fault they hate me not yours. They finally broke us I'm sorry.
Dear Danielle, you're me and I am you. Im sorry I gained so much weight last year, I'm sorry I couldn't lose it all. I'm sorry they hate us. I'm sorry mom can't get the braces we need. I'm sorry nothing ever works out for us. I'm sorry Jayte left. I'm sorry this is all real. I'm sorry I let you down. I'm sorry I couldn't save Lala. I'm sorry no one loves us. I'm sorry god doesn't listen. I'm sorry no one knows we are sad. I'm sorry I'm so sorry. It's all kind of blurry right now. There's so much blood I really can't see anymore. They say it'll get better, I wanna say it'll get better but it never does we just learn how to maintain. How to forget. And how to move on.....