Sometimes I wonder
If twelve months of moments
Were spent learning or forgetting
Casting old flames to water or gasoline
If we smiled or cried more
Then we ever had before
Sometimes I wonder
If twelve months of memories
Were held close or pushed away
Leaving us with everything or nothing to say                                              
If we took time or wasted it
On each other or on ourselves    
Sometimes I wonder
If twelve months of secrets
Built walls or shattered them
Kept keys or threw locks  
Watched shadowed eyes or widened mouths
Sometimes I wonder
If twelve months of us
Is a fact to be proud of or mourn
If I should consider my heart torn
If sunlight comes in the darkest of moments or if the dark is my home