lose two grandmothers
begin panicking about death
eat to avoid panicking
get bullied every day
wear larger clothes than your mother
suffer from extreme dysmorphia
begin self harming
keep self harming
try to stop
keep going
begin cycling consumption
fail
write about how food is the only thing that hasn't left
get told by your mother to go to church
go to church
begin to get better
get worse
reject common beliefs of your church
become a red-letter Christian
fall in love
fall hard
move schools
pass mirrors
don't cry anymore
start dieting
not starving
dieting
lose seven pounds
realize weight doesn't define you
weight doesn't define you.