Everywhere I go

people seem to follow.

They’re just sitting there.

Watching,

Waiting for me to slip up.

For most people

it has to be done a few times.

But for me,

it’s that first hit that gets me hooked-

That one taste,

that seals my fate.



It seems no matter how hard I try

the urge overwhelms and consumes me-

Like a beast in the night

showing no mercy towards its blind prey.

It’s just that every time I plan something,

every time I try to do something for my family,

it all turns wrong.

Not because I was unable to

but because I slipped up.

I slipped up.



I should have walked away

when I saw them light up that first cigar.

I should have said “No”.

But instead I sat there and lit up my fate-

Gave up my life.

I’d be a miracle if my family forgave me.

I’ve put them through so much pain,

and I just want to say,

“I’M SORRY!”

“I’M SORRY!”



I wish I could do it all over-

take the better path.

I suppose I shouldn’t live my life

dwelling in the past.

My mother always told me,

“Live life in the present

for the past has passed.”

I didn’t understand what she meant at first,

but now my eyes are open to all of life’s treasures.

Life is always changing-

And it’s never too late for that!

NEVER!