so I realize
every now and then
the way I lie to myself
and actually believe it.
In the end
I realize
no one is an angel, really
and maybe everything IS my fault, really
but who ******* cares?
I've never been good at making something out of nothing.

I feel a whole lot of nothingness coming on...
what are you thinking: nothing.
what are you feeling: nothing..
whats wrong? NOTHING!!
what will make things better?
... nothing...

because my downfall will be
thinking
and feeling
that everything is nothing
all the time.