I don't. Really. you broke my heart. but not only that you broke it in a way that will never heal. Not only that…the fact remains that I let you do it. twice. I forgave and forgot and let myself pretend. Green grass. Long days in sun. Belief and trust, in our power to overcome, in you to be different. But in the end all is done. note to self: he is the way he is and you are you that won't change. not if he changes his friend group. not if he quits smoking. not if he flies from the cage that is his baggage. Never. So after all I Don't Give A ****. If your life's equation adds up to getting high and being too cool to care. great. But my life equation is filled with real love, happiness, and family. I'm past you now. You are the shiny red tricycle that I once depended on but have out grown now. Now you'll be in the backyard, rusting dreaming of the good old days.