As I stare across this fire,
The heat from the flame is
Directly reflected in my eye.
I know they see my jealousy.
That girl with hair as warm as this fire,
Is not looking at me.
Not like she should be.

Instead she’s making secretive glances at her boyfriend.
While my face is heating up past boiling point.
I can feel my heart ripping itself apart
Literally piece by piece.

It starts with all the parts that are attracted to this girl.
Ripping away all the gasps when she smiled at me.
Then the times she held me close.
The memory carved into my heart
Of that ******* smell she carries.
Like home.

More specifically, my heart rips away that night,
I fell for her in a diner bathroom.
On the floor while I was falling to pieces
And she put her arms around them
And held me together.

She said it would all be okay.
But it’s not right now.
Not while I watch her snuggle on this cold October night
With this boy who I really actually like,
But couldn’t possibly hate more
In this very moment.

I want to rip them apart,
But apparently I settle for ripping myself apart.
My heart scratches at all the times
They warned,
Don’t fall for a straight girl.
But I didn’t listen.
And I couldn’t listen.

And here everyone looks for love,
But I’ve found it
And let me tell you she’s not as pretty
As they say she is.
See Love isn’t a *****,
But she is deceiving.
She pushes you head over heels,
Then Fate comes over and kicks your ***.

When a gay girl
Falls for a straight one.
She hits the ground.
And in my experience,
I’m still trying to get up.