I know how I feel. I'm just too lazy to describe all of it through text; since there is so much to put down.
Feelings are never complicated. I don’t want to describe my feelings for you as complicated. We can just use the term ‘sad.’ My feelings for you aren’t sad itself, but when you listen to it as a whole you would see how sad it seems.
My feelings display how scared, paranoid, and worried I am. As if I know what to do, but I’m not fully sure of how much I can’t do it, or if I would even do it at all. My feelings show how ambitious and optimistic I am. They reassure myself of how much heart and peace I have. My feelings express how hopeless I am. A hopeless romantic is all that it means. I only say “I don’t know,” because I’m either afraid of facing the outcome, or too lazy to put my time into something that requires so much analysis. I have patience and empathy, but to actually identify this whole bunch that I deal with daily is just so overwhelming.
We have reasons why our feelings can be described as ‘complicated.’ Whether we have contradicting ideas (not everyone can be so sure of what they’re feeling, so they try to choose the middle side and make both ideas useful), or we just describe them in a way that others won’t be able to follow.
I just don’t know for my feelings right now. I haven’t even given myself time to sort them out because when I do, my thoughts became scattered and I just lose my ability to handle them. It’s not that I don’t care, but I just wish I had help when trying to figure them out.
I want to give up, but I don’t. So I just end up putting them to the side, and just take a nap. Now excuse me, I’m going to take a nap.