When you ask me how I am doing, I might say I'm doing okay, or fine,
I might reply with an eh, or a meh,
But there's a lot of thought and question when you ask me
Because a lot of the time I don't know what okay means anymore
I might shrug and avoid your question because i don't want to lie
I might hide behind an "i'm making it" or an "i'm doing"
Those usually get me off the hook pretty easily.
What i will not do it tell you that I am fantastic when I am struggling each moment.
I will not lie to you.
So when you ask me how I'm doing, what I say will probably depend on how open i feel that day . It will probably depend on how much i can handle thinking about everything that's going on. How much i can share without breaking down in public. There is a lot that goes into keeping even a sort of smile on this face.
Don't ask unless you care, truly care, and don't judge me until you've been in my place.