Replaying the past in my head
The night I let you in, and how did I?
How easy it was, to forgive and trust
never again, fear no serpents in my bed
addicted to the feeling of connection

My trauma filled heart- invaded in seconds
Thorns stripped away, thickness of your skin
Roses with bleeding peddles, persuading me
To stay in this feeling of false harmony,
How deaf am I?

Pretty ******* deaf
I didnt hear them knocking at the door
How dead am I?
Just dead enough to wait for them
To relocate your pale body before
Your soul drifts though the ceiling.  

So when we grow up
maybe or not
maybe you won't notice
But maybe you will
                                    do me the decency
Of letting me know you are alive
And that you knew what you wanted?