I haven't written to you in a very long time.

That's not true, I've written of you,
But I've written lies.

I've written about how you hurt people,
And how I'm stronger without you.
How I let you die inside me,
Like a miscarried child, someone I was never really meant to meet
and how I'm better now.

But in truth, darling, I miss you.

And I hate you.

And I want you,

but I can't have you.

Your kisses were sweet relief,
Your taste was divine.
And now I look for your face on every corner,
I look for a reason to call you up again,
even though I know there is never a good reason
to call you up again.

She hates you.
He's afraid of you,
But they don't know what you mean to me.

I love you.
I am not afraid,
The night I almost gave you my heart was not a cry for help.

I want you back.
I want to feel like I am human.

I want to open up and wear my love, seeping through my sleeve.

I am so lost without you.