That day. When your blood was not yet dry on the concrete. Is not so far removed from tonight.

That day is so real in my mind.
The call. The frantic drive. Stopping and yelling out your name. The cop saying they had gotton a call d.o.a.  I didn't believe it.

Til I rounded the lake and saw your brother
Head in hands.

"She's gone."

"Like gone gone."

And all.I could think was that there was no way that it could be true. That life was inconceivable with your absence.  

And tonight that seems
The same.


So mom.and I break down going through your things.
And still
Find it
Unbelievable.