there were things i had never imagined i would understand be; experience and gape bemusedly at my unbelieving ambiguous eyes in the unnoticeably clear smiling mirror of the bathroom.
things such as being a creep
the creep whose wandering eye wanders just a wee bit longer. A microsecond length of the not-understood, the suspicious,the dubious the curious sometimes, but really mostly nefarious lunatic, perhaps...?
the creep whose teeth clench into a smile. the lips parting but only Mendaciously...perhaps..?
the creep who peers into me like a god scouring my precious little secrets my hurt points, my loci of scandalous innocuous things meant to be inside of me for my self.
the creep who infringes on my warm bed of Safety.
*** ******* erectile dysfunction sneer ****** ***** me father mother weirdity all the complexes
that make you Feel
like a spider whose web is shattered with but an uncaring finger.
power. Uncaring Callousness
terrifying in it's brutality intent , and things beyond .
the creep peers in.
but i was only trying to make friends. a bit too hard , perhaps...?
oh the creeps of the world i understand thy plight the fact that you never understand what you are doing but only after it has passed that the black hole irises of un-understanding visages come to you to inform you that you have been a creep, the Creep.
a bit too Freudian ,I see. now reads to me like an abuser's ode to self. but i really was just talking about harmless staring.