The sky looked down on me
It was ashamed
I was blinded by
My emotions
And could not look past
The smog
To see
Every
Single
Star
"I tried!"
I yell at the sky
The sky does not care
Failure is unacceptable
And the sky wraps around me
Surrounds me
And grounds me to a single point
The vertex of infinity
Where it feels strange to be
Alive
I step out of my body
And into nothing
And the nothing steps back into me
Like a great cascade of cold and blackness
I am replaced with emptiness
And my body flees
I am left
Standing alone in the field of memory
I see everything that can be
That will be
That has been
That is
That mustn't be
I am shown the truth
The truth that inscribed unto every grain of sand
Is all of time and space
That the faces of all the people of your past
Can be found
Within the skin of an acorn
That all the things you will accomplish
Are written as a list
On the tip of a needle
I am shown that everything
Runs on a universal code
That everything
Can be
And will be
Written over
By whomever holds the marker
I walk through the field mildly
Paying strict attention at first
Noting the worst
And the best
Of memories
But then I freeze
And fall to my knees
Because I see
I see what I have searched for for so long
The memory of me
It is marked with charcoal
Edges smudged
On the corner of a
Small
Gray
Rock
And I know
That it is because I have not
Seized the day
I have not stopped and smelled the flowers
Nor brushed past them on a mission
I have simply been
And been content with simply being
And my memory in the grand scheme
Would fade as easily as a page
Let burn
I grabbed a chisel that was strength
And a hammer that was conviction
And I carved my memory unto
The largest boulder there was
And when I threw down the bottle
With its rag halfway reaching for the flame
And halfway hiding in the kerosene
And it smashed on the field
Everything burned
Everything was erased
Except for my memory
Carved on the largest boulder
And the sky smiled
For it knew that I had now realized
The true nature of its
Disappointment
Come, child
I must take you home
There is much to do
"You're ****** right there is"