Of all the loves that I’ve loved in life
There was one, crème de la crème,
She turned my head and she caused me strife
But I loved her, way back when,
I met the woman by accident
As the ex-wife of a friend,
We’d see each other and look away
In a game we called ‘Pretend’.

‘Pretend’ she didn’t attract me then,
‘Pretend’ I couldn’t care less,
And she’d ‘Pretend’ that I held no sway
When she’d hide her eagerness.
We’d say, ‘Now, what a coincidence
That you happen to be here!’
But fate provided the incidents
For the best part of a year.

She ditched the guy she was seeing then
And I started calling round,
Just for a morning coffee break
And we’d stare each other down.
There was love and hate in each debate
We’d agree to disagree,
She’d say, ‘I’m glad that I’m not with you,’
And I’d say, ‘That goes for me!’

But then, if ever I missed a day
She’d say, ‘Where did you go?
I had a ride, but I stayed inside
Then in fact, you didn’t show!’
And sometimes, when she was out about
I would knock, and feel aggrieved,
‘Why weren’t you home at ten o’clock?’
I’d say, and she’d look relieved.

We felt a reverse attraction like
The same magnetic pole,
Pushing each other away today
Tomorrow, joined at the soul.
The tension there was electric once
That everything had been said,
And there on a Monday holiday
We tumbled into bed.

Our love was a roller coaster that
Would speed us up to the stars,
Bathed in a perspiration that
Was cold as the planet Mars,
And nothing was ever long enough
It was more like a disease,
For neither of us were strong enough
So we crawled away on our knees.

If love is a desperation to
Cling on to the one you need,
That was the explanation for
The love that we felt was greed.
I thought that I’d found the only one
That this love would never fail,
It was if I had found a holy one
In a search for the Holy Grail.

But nothing will last forever, for
The planets will move along,
Challenging each endeavour, be it
Love, or the right from wrong,
She slowly began to drift away
In search for a sense of self,
Begged for the space to run her race
And left me, high on the shelf.

I spent her absence, caught in a trance
And staring long at the wall,
I knew my soul was lost in advance
When I got the final call,
She fell enceinte with another’s child
Though she wanted to come back home,
But I was too hurt to take her back
So I soldiered on, alone.

Of all the loves that I’ve loved in life
There was one, crème de la crème,
She turned my head and she caused me strife
But I loved her, way back when,
I haven’t seen her for thirty years
But she has a place in my soul,
While I am playing the game ‘Pretend’
And the world is growing old.

David Lewis Paget