we'd park his death trap and
my hand would
grasp the door handle.
just one pull with a few fingers
would release the door's lock
and the hinge would come alive
with a faint squeak.
instead,
he'd always linger and stall
and find ridiculous excuses
to stop us from getting out of the car
just yet.
he'd ask countless
and, frankly,
useless questions about next to nothing
and my impatience would build.
within minutes I'd tell him to shut up
and just get out
'cause he's being annoying and taking too long.

that's when he'd pause.

big brown eyes consume the blue of mine
and I can't breathe never mind speak.
awkwardly but gently,
sweetly but honestly,
he'd ask if he could kiss me.

those are the moments i remember.
those are the moments i won't forget.
those are the moments that made me feel
alive.
those are the moments that kept me alive
when I didn't want to do this life **** anymore.

i love you and i will always love you.
no day goes by where i don't think of the
chocolate brown of your eyes and
the long, thick lashes that decorated them;
no day goes by where i don't think of the
two dark freckles on your jawline
that could only be seen when
you clean-cut, freshly shaved;
no day goes by where i don't think of
your chain and
how it fell around your smooth olive skin
and how my fingers would curve
and twist and
****** the steel
when I would jump from
the passenger seat to the driver's,
on top of you;
no day goes by where I don't wish
I could relive those days
over and over
and ******* over
again.

i'm no longer sad you broke my heart,
i am forever in love with
the memories of you having
held my heart
with strong hands
for even just
a moment.
maybe in another life,
we'll meet again.
even for just one more
**** moment;
one
more
moment
to
last
a
lifetime.