does it make you want me more
when you see me talk to him?
he says something soft
his hand slides up my leg bare,
the kind of touch that means nothing
but looks like everything
i wore this underwear for you
purple lace
fragile as a secret i’ll never tell out loud
his fingers trace it
and i think about yours
the way they tremble when you want something
but won’t admit it
how bad do you ache
watching
knowing it’s his hands who touched them first
but it’s your name
that hums under my breath
when no one’s listening
i press farther into the man i don’t want
heart to heart
skin to skin
only so i can feel your jealousy crawl up my spine
that heat
that holy ache
you’ve never looked at me like this before
your silence is gasoline
your stare a match
and i’m burning alive
burning
burning
burning
how long will you stand there
jaw set, heart shaking in your chest
before you come closer
before you let me ruin you
the way i’ve already ruined myself
how much longer do i have to let
this man’s mouth live rent free on mine
when all i want is to taste the sin of you
it’s not love, not yet
it’s something worse
something holy
something that feels
like being worshiped
and punished