I could see my breath as I rested my head against your thigh.

It was almost as thick as your cigarette smoke

Which crawled down my throat and burned my nostrils

We couldn’t afford the heat bill, we couldn’t afford anything

But I stopped mentioning that

I remember the first time i did,you got so angry

I watched the defensive walls begin to build

The comments made you feel less than a man

Because you couldn't provide for me

At least not in your mind

It made you feel like your father

I watched the muscles in your neck strain against your skin

Any second now… I thought they’d rip right through

The vein in your temple

Growing bigger as you yelled

Your voice pierced my ears like glass fibers being shoved through them

You told me you knew I was weak

That you knew I couldn’t handle it

You left after that

In a rage of red, leaving destruction

The night seemed cold after that, chilly

Watching the clock I think to how we got here

I didn’thear your footsteps till 4:22

The morning became still

As my heart beat matched your steps

There was no car alarm going off anymore

No hissing from the cat fight in the ally

It was just quiet

I watched the door **** move

You came right in no hesitation

And I knew you felt miserable

I could see it in your eyes as I brushed your tears away

Felt it in you touch as I kissed ‘I’m sorry’ away