Walking down an alley with you
We talked about China’s one child law
and the flaws of procreation

I admitted I had intrusive thoughts
and nightmares about hurting children
and how it scares me

we both got quiet

I couldn’t breathe so we sat down,
I don’t know why I said that, I’m just
tired of living alone in my fear,

My hands used to create life
And beautiful things, now
they just shake and destroy
like they’re wired all wrong,

my brain misfires and
shatters everything I love,

I should be quarantined,
put away forever,
I should be dead.

- S.G.