I stepped to the side
Of the large, guffawing
Crowd, my luggage
Hanging quietly from
My loose arms.
I sketched the faces
With my eyes,
Memorizing them
As I trailed my fingers
Over the green rails,
And the memories
I would never have.
I was not there,
In that moment.
I was a bystander,
A bodiless camera
Watching, watching,

Finally breathing.
It felt easier, to not be
Involved, needed, or
Cared for. This way,
I was not a burden.