i used to be so vulnerable and honest.
but after having so many people take advantage of me,
i no longer recognize myself.
i started lying in hopes it would protect me.
now i can't stop because i'd rather lie than be honest about how isolating it feels to actually be me.
the things i want to say i push to the back of my mind and continue with my life because it hurts less and i think less.
but even then...
i continue to swallow the isolation that fills up every bone in my body.
the things i want to say / i swallow.